There’s a new study out with the findings that the longer individuals know each other prior to the start of a relationship, the less important physical attractiveness becomes. Quite interesting. From observations, quite possibly true.
But beyond romantic relationships to life in general: How much of who we are can really be found in our appearance? Outside of how we chose to dress and the attention we give to how we look, not much.
Can you really know a person by how he looks? Not likely. But you may find him in his works. His passion, his focus, his voice, and by what he leaves behind.
You are not your appearance but your choices.
And you are responsible not for your appearance but your choices.
It shocks me, then, how we’re constantly drawn to looks and possessions.
(In all honesty, I sometimes catch myself focused on those as well.)
But those are so transient. Age and trials are great levelers in life.
Naturally, this reminded me of another quote:
We see only the results which a man’s choices make out of his raw material. But God does not judge him on the raw material at all, but on what he has done with it. Most of the man’s psychological make-up is probably due to his body: when his body dies all that will fall off him, and the real central man – the thing that chose, that made the best or the worst out of this material, will stand naked. All sorts of nice things which we thought our own, but which were really due to a good digestion, will fall off some of us: all sorts of nasty things which were due to complexes or bad health will fall off others. We shall then, for the first tune, see every one as he really was. There will be surprises. | C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity
My uncle recently shared this quote with me: Anyone can find dirt on someone; Be the one that finds the gold.
It was good advice, especially for when I find I’m being judgmental.
My purpose here isn’t to judge, but to help and guide as I’m needed.
And to look deeper, beyond mere appearances.
To seek for – and bring out – the best in someone.
Not in our strength, but by His.
Yet another lesson.